Zach Selwyn

Actor. Musician. Host. Writer. Dinner Guest.

  • Zach and Missi Pyle have a new podcast called “Missi and Zach Might Bang!” Exec. Produced by Anna Faris and Sim Sarna of “Anna Faris is Unqualified” – the show takes on celebrity guests, improvisational music and offers entertainment business advice as well! Head to http://www.ewpopfest.com to buy tickets now!!!

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    Anna Faris Entertainment Weekly EW Might Bang Missi Pyle podcast popfest Sim Sarna Zach Selwyn
  • “LA DISPENSARY” LAUNCHES AS A GROUNDBREAKING VERTICAL INSTAGRAM SERIES EXPLORING LOS ANGELES’ CANNABIS CULTURE

    Los Angeles, CA – The cultural capital of cannabis finally has its own story told on screen. “LA Dispensary”, a new vertical comedy series that premiered on Instagram and YouTube Shorts takes viewers inside the quirky world of a fictional Los Angeles dispensary.

    TRAILER HERE

    Shot entirely in vertical format to match the way audiences consume content on their phones, “LA Dispensary” blends sketch comedy and observational humor from the perspective of two budtenders, played by Megahn Perry and writer/director Zach Selwyn. New guest stars enter the dispo every episode.

    “Cannabis is not just a product —it’s a lifestyle, a culture, and a community,” said Selwyn. “With ‘LA Dispensary’, I wanted to create something that was funny and original – as far as I can tell, this is one of the first vertical comedies out there which I think will be the future of Hollywood now that the studios have all moved to Ireland.”

    The series is designed for quick, binge-worthy viewing on Instagram, making it accessible to a global audience. The first two episodes have been released through Hiii Media’s Instagram @hiiimag – as well as @LADispensaryshow

    For Press Inquiries reach out to Zach@hiiimag.com

    420 acting cannabis Comedy dispensary funny humor improv Los Angeles marketing movies Music news SNL weed writing Zach Selwyn
  • First two episodes launch Thursday, August 28, 2025

    https://embed.podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/welcome-to-n-i-l-university/id1829007772?i=1000719030779

    Cloud10 Media and Writer/director Zach Selwyn bring you the first ever scripted podcast about the NIL deals permeating NCAA sports – specifically college football. First two episodes launching Thursday August 28!

    “You’ll never have four year starters at a mid-major university anymore… don’t blame me – blame the NIL”

    Cloud10 coaches College drama field goal football Friday Night Lights High school football Josh Cooke Kickoff Los Angeles NCAA NIL NIL deals podcast quarterback Recruitment Riggins running back scripted Texas touchdown Zach Selwyn
  • https://bandcamp.com/EmbeddedPlayer/album=2515935575/size=large/bgcol=ffffff/linkcol=0687f5/tracklist=false/tran

    Eminem freestyle G LOVE LIVE Lobos Riders Outlaw Country rap Zachariah
  • Someone get this to Bravo and Andy Cohen… #Ozempic

    Andy Cohen Bravo Comedy funny Ozempic Real Housewives SNL Zach Selwyn
  • Zach breaks down the crowd, the Seattle Mariners and Lenny Kravitz’ penis.

    Live from August 4, 2015…

    420 country-rock Eminem freestyle rap I got Robbed Music poulsbo slippery pig Zach Selwyn Zachariah and the Lobos Riders
  • Premieres Sunday February 19! on AXS TV!

    AXS TV Comedy Emmy hosting Mick Mars Motley Crue Nikki Sixx Parking Lot Payday Sofi Tommy Lee Vince Neil Zach Selwyn
  • From LA Dispensary and Hiii Magazine. The Full Bush Girlfriened Reunion is here!

    Written/Directed by Zach Selwyn

    Starring Zach Selwyn, Dylan Berry, RJ Robinson, Wendy Selwyn

    (Associated Press) Zach Selwyn’s popular vertical comedy series “LA Dispensary” has spawned a spinoff short film about his 90’s Grunge Band “Full Bush Girlfriend.” The shrt comedy reunited original members Doug, Brandon Horses and Gerbil alongside their one groupie, Molly Slunt. This raucous eight minute film is a nod to indy fillmmakers around the world and to anyone who has ever chased a dream…

    90's Comedy dylan berry funny grunge humor Los Angeles RJ RObinson rock Seattle smashhaus SNL Wendy Selwyn Zach Selwyn
  • Bill-Walton-1  Recently, on social media and my website, I have made no secret of my modern return into the world of competitive basketball. I play full court four days a week at the Hollywood YMCA and recently entered a Three-on-Three tournament against other fathers at elementary schools, which I happened to have won. (My proudest athletic achievement in my life to date – not counting the time I took Colton – the star 7-year-old pitcher – DEEP in a father-son Little League game last summer…)

    -5
    Ray, me and James – LCS 3 on 3 Dad Champions

    I have re-discovered a love for the game I haven’t had sine 1993 and I’m actually a better player now than I have ever been.

    Throughout my life and into high school, basketball was everything. As a 6’2” inch eighth grader, I was groomed by my coach to become the next great Arizona Wildcats big man. Unfortunately, I haven’t grown an inch since eighth grade. I switched to the wing, where I lacked certain skills, but was still able to hold my own mainly because I was actually grabbing the rim with ease and in top physical shape. However, around age 18, I discovered the usual pitfalls – Weed, beer and women – and decided that since I had no chance, or interest in walking on my college team, I would hang up my Air Jordan XII’s and I only stepped on the court a handful of times over the ensuing decade.

    -8
    The author (circa 1992) on the left just before discovering cannabis.

    A few years ago, however, I was listening to UCLA great and fellow Grateful Dead-Head Bill Walton broadcast an Arizona- Oregon basketball game, when something he said struck me deep inside. After he spent a few minutes comparing some obscure 1970’s Bob Dylan song to the Oregon Ducks’ fast-break technique, he discussed his history of injuries he attained while playing. At the end of this sidebar, Bill Walton claimed to have broken his nose 13 times.

    “That’s what happens when you play defense with your face,” he exclaimed.

    He also mentioned his surgically fused ankles, incinerated spine, broken wrists, 36 surgeries and broken leg – all suffered on the basketball court. Walton’s lifelong injuries, along with his 1978–1979 year-long protest of the Portland Trail Blazers unethical treatment of his injuries, gave him the record of missing the most games during an NBA playing career, when taking into account the number of years he was officially listed as a player on a team roster. He spoke of how debilitating it became to walk and I researched even deeper to see that Walton once even contemplated suicide due to severe depression from debilitating back pain.

    However, Walton then made a comment that made his life on the disabled list seem even more surreal… He observed a certain move power forward Solomon Hill had made and remarked, “That is a move to study – for those of you who are still lucky enough to play basketball…”

    Lucky? How could 13 broken noses and suicidal thoughts be considered lucky? I felt that I was lucky to have quit basketball with my original nose still in place. What was Walton talking about?

    Attempting to find out, the next day I dusted off some 10-year-old shoes and made my first trip to a court in what was nearly five or six years. I checked out a basketball at the YMCA that looked as if it had spent a good majority of its life underwater, and went to shoot around. It took me awhile, but eventually I was making short jump shots and working on my cardiovascular fitness while running up and down the gymnasium floor. Some of my old spin moves came back to me, and I put up a couple of nice finger rolls and hit some three pointers. It actually felt amazing.

    -1About an hour later, a few guys asked me if I wanted to play “21” with them, but I declined, afraid of shooting 9 air balls and getting embarrassed. Instead, I continued to work on some post moves and drives and watched them from the corner of my eye. They were laughing, having fun and playing just above the level where I was – which made me think I might have hung in there if I had accepted their challenge. Instead, I returned my ball and went home and told myself I’d be back the next day.

    I did come back the next day. And the next. I ran that court nearly every other day for months until I was actually joining the games of 21 and winning a good majority of the time. For the first time in over a decade, I was having a lot of fun playing basketball. I soon found myself in the full court games and now, three years later, found myself coming home and discussing the games with my wife as if I was playing in the NBA Finals. It became an obsession to the point where if I missed a lay-up during a game, I got depressed for the rest of the day. Still, it drove me to come back again, improve and remedy the situation.

    -4
    My shrink had me draw a self portrait of what made me happy. Statistics are “close enough…”

    My wife thought I was nuts. Every time I would bring up my day on the court, she would roll her eyes and remind me that I’m more Kevin Arnold than I am Kevin Durant. She also warned me to be careful, to which I reminded her that I was playing against a bunch of guys in their 30’s and that I was in better shape than most of them.

    And then, about six months ago, I got smashed in the nose by a teenager who lowered his shoulder into me on a penetration. My nose now cracks in both directions when I try to move it, but I luckily avoided a full break. Then, a couple weeks later I was slightly concussed after being run under by a guy who was pissed that I was outplaying him. I ended up sitting out two days nursing my brain – which luckily was not permanently damaged. In December, I took an elbow to the bridge of my nose, which caused it to bleed profusely all over the court and earned me 75 “likes” on Instagram.

    -3
    Blood on the basketball court. 75 “likes” on Instagram

    In February, I jammed my left thumb so hard during a rebound that I am still having trouble operating the zippers on my jeans. Then I jammed my right pointer and ring finger in consecutive games. I’m consistently fighting shin splints and a bone spur. Finally, last week, I discovered that I have bursitis in my right shoulder and that I might not be able to play for three weeks or so. This will be my first trip to the disabled list in my athletic career. And I’m a month away from 40. According to my dad, the injuries will now just start piling up. In short, I am about to enter my Bill Walton years. Now, my family is giving me all kinds of advice.

    “Maybe think about not playing anymore,” my mother offered. “You know, you’re no spring chicken.”

    I hung up on her.

    “A spin class is much better on your body,” my dad suggested. I simply sent him pictures of my three-on-three trophy and told him I’d be back on the court in a month.

    “Don’t do anything stupid, you don’t want to really hurt yourself,” my wife told me.

    I rolled my eyes and studied Russell Westbrook highlights like it was important game film.

    During the past week, I have found myself watching Bill Walton again. I guess recently there have been petitions to remove him from the Pac-12 broadcast booth, which upsets me entirely. Sure, he can go on tangents about the time Bob Weir and him spoke Arabic to camels in the Egyptian desert, but his unique and loveable qualities are what make him a treasure in the booth. He’s not a cookie-cutter color guy. He’s quotable and full of basketball wisdom. In fact, he may be my favorite college basketball announcer working today. Not only does he know the game, he makes it fun. I know he seems like he might be high or severely “out-there” once in awhile, but his love for the game is like nobody’s I’ve ever heard before. Not only that, his passion for the game is what got me playing basketball again.

    Rock & Pop - Grateful Dead - Bob Weir - #fl_0108
    Bob Weir of the Grateful Dead in Egypt ’76

    Without Bill Walton, I’d still be jogging three miles on a treadmill. Not competing and not getting any sense of accomplishment.

    For that, I thank you Mr. Walton. For inspiring me to lace up my sneakers that early morning three and a half years ago and return to the sport of my youth.

    Bill-Walton
    Walton at the height of his game resembling the lead singer of My Morning Jacket. (1978)

    The evening after I won the three-on-three “Dads” championship, my wife said I had a “glow” about me. I knew what she was talking about, because I felt it. It was a sense of invincibility and achievement. I felt young again. Above the rim. It brought to mind a famous Bill Walton quote I had read years ago when he said, “You don’t win championships by being normal, by being average…”

    I may have only defeated a bunch of dads in a Saturday pick-up tournament, but for those of us who are just hanging onto the final glimpses of what we might be able to accomplish as men, it was as if I won an NBA Championship.

    Now if you excuse me, I have to go ice my shoulder. I’m planning on returning to the court earlier than expected…

    -6
    The LCS “3 on 3” basketball trophies I won. My proudest athletic achievement to date.

    Buy Zach’s BOOK at amazon.com!

    **UPDATE!** Read Bill Walton’s email to ZACH below following the publication of this essay!!

    Bill.Walton <bill.walton@billwalton.com

    to me
    all good things in all good time

    here we go—-forward, furthur,
    good everything forever, BW,
    and please don’t play defense with your face, there’s no future in that

    BUY ZACH'S BOOK at AMAZON.COM!

    READ SOME WALTON-ISMs HERE : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/b/bill_walton.html

    announcing Basketball. March Madness Bill Simmons Bill Walton Chuck Palhuinak ESPN essays funny Grantland hoops humor NBA UCLA Zach Selwyn
  • https://allnashvilleroadshow.com


    ABOUT ALL NASHVILLE ROADSHOW?

    All Nashville Roadshow brings the heart of Music City to you! Featuring live performances by incredible Nashville artists, authentic Southern food, and craft beers, our under-the-stars festival delivers an unforgettable evening of music, connection, and community. It’s like stepping into the vibrant streets of Nashville—without ever leaving your town.

    With every detail curated to perfection, from the music to the atmosphere, All Nashville Roadshow is more than just an event—it’s an experience. Gather your friends, grab your tickets, and get ready to make memories that will stay with you long after the last encore. Don’t miss your chance to feel the magic of Nashville, right in your backyard!

    GET YOUR TICKETS NOW!

    UPCOMING ROADSHOWS

    Friday, March 28, 2025 @ 7:00PM

    Madison, Georgia. Madison-Morgan Cultural Center

    ORDER TICKETS

    Saturday, March 29, 2025 @ 7:00PM

    Trilith (Fayetteville), Georgia. Central Park at Trilith

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    Friday, April 11, 2025 @ 7:00PM

    Hiawassee, Georgia. Georgia Mountain Fairgrounds

    ORDER TICKETS

    Saturday, April 12, 2025 @ 7:00PM

    Dahlonega, Georgia. R-Ranch in the Mountains

    ORDER TICKETS

    ALL NASHVILLE ROADSHOW America Comedy festivals funny hosting improv live music Nashville redneck dad jewish mother Roadshow Stand up touring Zach Selwyn Zachariah
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It’s been two years since Zach’s Rock ‘n’ Roll Ralphs short story went viral! Relive the dream!

  • May 29, 2025
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

Read Zach’s New Short Story: An Aging Rocker Revisits Sunset Boulevard’s “Rock-N-Roll Ralph’s”

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READ ZACH’S NEW Hiii MAGAZINE STORY: “BLOOD ON THE FLOOR: GOING TO A LAS VEGAS CANNABIS CONVENTION ON A WEDNESDAY”

  • May 14, 2025
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Hero · Homepage · Short Story · The Writer · Uncategorized

https://www.hiiimag.com/articles/blood-on-the-floor?fbclid=IwY2xjawKRwAVleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBicmlkETE4NjlvempHZmFKY2YwWnR3AR7xMnYp6m9tNdR1QblyEzkVqyYjtMZycT_VACnQCTw-0IEl447JILDlkEYHWA_aem_Iakl9Rnjk9Ml7PlhC5E1uQ

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LIVE SHOWS SUMMER 2025

  • March 10, 2025
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Comedy · Comedy MP3's · Comedy Music News · comedy, music, lyrics, jay-Z, beyonce, blue ivy · Film/TV · Parking Lot Payday · Podcasts · Sketch Comedy · Television · Uncategorized · Zachariah & The Lobos Riders

June 26 – Desert 5 Spot with the Y’all Star Review

June 27 – The Troubadour – with Louden Swain

July 12 – Friday, July 11, 2025 @ 7:00PM

Collegedale, Tennessee

The Commons

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Saturday, July 12, 2025 @ 7:00PM

Adairsville, Georgia

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July 19 – Red Truck Beer Concert Series – Vancouver Canada

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Friday, August 8, 2025 @ 7:00PM

Milton, Georgia

Market District Crabapple

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Saturday, August 9, 2025 @ 7:00PM

Braselton, Georgia

Braselton Town Green

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Friday, August 29, 2025 @ 7:00PM

Tupelo, Mississippi 

TBA

COMING SOON

Saturday, August 30, 2025 @ 7:00PM

Pell City, Alabama

August 16 – Keyport Fest – Keyport, Washington

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Zach Plays Desert Five Spot Tomorrow Night!

  • May 8, 2024
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

Zachariah gonna play some Waylon & Flying Burrito Brothers w/ the Desert 5 Y’All Star Band Tomorrow Night! See ya at 9:30 pm!

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Stream “Attack of the Doc!” on YouTube Now!

  • January 20, 2024
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

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Truck Nutz * By Billy Ray Raymond

  • October 30, 2023
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

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Check Out “The Ballad of Uncle Drank” Podcast!

  • September 13, 2022
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

Zach wrote and directed this comedic musical podcast starring Will Sasso, Brian. Kelley (FGL) Luke Wilson, Chelcie Lynn and Billy Zane as a talking blender named BLENDY

@!https://link.chtbl.com/uncledrank

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Hear Zachariah’s New Song “Five Glasses of Wine”

  • September 2, 2022
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

https://open.spotify.com/embed/album/65YIMsJO8eOlrrjSVdCxa5?utm_source=generator

Streaming everywhere now. Produced by Justin Stanley & Leroy Miller. (c) 2022 Papago Records / Desert Hobo Music (ASCAP)

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Watch Zach’s New Show “Parking Lot Payday” on AXSTV! 8e/7c – Every Tuesday!

  • July 19, 2022
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

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Zachariah/Lobos Riders THIS SUNDAY at Bourbon Room Hollywood! Open for OLD 97’s!

  • June 1, 2022
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Uncategorized

In what will be the first full band show in LA since last year, Zachariah & the Lobos Riders will play the front lounge of the Bourbon Room this Sunday at 8pm/ Zach will also be opening solo on the Main Stage for the Old 97’s at 7:30. Admission to Z LR is $10… more info at http://www.bourbonroomhollywood.com

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