Zach Selwyn

Actor. Musician. Host. Writer. Dinner Guest.

  • Rodeo Zach is back… and the new single is BLOWING UP. Everywhere. Check the video out and demand to see Zach on tour either solo or with Bubbles and the Shitrockers!!!

    Adam Sandler Bo Burnham Comedy funny humor Jack Black lonely Island Los Angeles Netflix SNL Zach Selwyn Zachariah
  • Rodeo Zach grammy campaignDownload
    Comedy funny humor improv Los Angeles Music Ozempic passover rap self checkout SNL sober Zach Selwyn
  • americana country-rock guitar Hores i see hawks in LA Music townes van zandt
  • https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/countrylinen/make-it-happen-country-linen-zachariahs-new-album/widget/video.html

    https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/countrylinen/make-it-happen-country-linen-zachariahs-new-album/widget/card.html?v=2

    country rock kickstarter Outlaw Country Warren Zevon Wilco. Zach Selwyn Zachariah Zachariah and the Lobos Riders
  • IMG_0320.jpg

    Comedy country funny johnny cash Merle Haggard Outlaw Country waylon jennings willie nelson Zach Selwyn Zachariah
  • 420 Comedy high times hiii humor Ian Powell Legacy Cannabis marijuana Mendocino Mendocino Grasslands Ukiah weed writer Yokayo Ranch Zach Selwyn
  • Missi Pyle and Zach Selwyn are back at it this week performing live from the legendary Hotel Cafe – 1623 Cahuenga Blvd. in Los Angeles – special guests from Missi’s new YouTube Red show! $10 at door

    IMG_4740

    Anna Faris Comedy Hollywood hotel cafe Missi Pyle podcast unqalified
  • Zachariah’s new song explores the corporate logo marketing travesty that all of us 90’s kids endure every time we see a Nirvana or Ramones shirt for sale in Target or Wal-Mart. Back in 1992 I had to go to the concert to buy a $30 shirt. Now the logo is on onesies.

    DOWNLOAD SONG HERE! – https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/nirvana-t-shirt-single/id1035706248

    dave grohl kurt cobain nirvana Ramones Zach Selwyn Zachariah t shirt
  • Episode #17 Missi Pyle & Zach Selwyn

     

    We play “Fake or Florida” and talk about women’s panties…

  • Bartneders country rock Los Angeles Zach Selwyn Zachariah
  • Home
  • CORPORATE EVENTS
  • Zachariah & The Lobos Riders
    • The Band
    • MP3’s
    • WHERE’S ZACH ON TOUR!?
  • The Writer
  • COUNTRY LINEN
  • Film/TV
    • America’s Secret Slang
    • Film/TV
    • Reels
  • Comedy
    • Sketch Comedy
    • Comedy Music
    • Comedy MP3’s
  • Contact/Booking

Tag: levis

Coming to Terms with a Vintage Clothing Addiction: An Essay.

  • December 21, 2017
  • by zachselwyn
  • · Homepage · Short Story · The Writer · Uncategorized

web1_goodwillexpansion15_6677382

For most of my adult life, I have been a lover of thrift stores. I would go into any Goodwill, Savers or church-owned thrift shop and pillage the racks for hours until I found the perfect used t-shirt to compliment my 1972 patchwork denim jeans. I loved putting together some phenomenal 1960’s-inspired rocker outfit complete with old cowboy boots and a stranger’s snap cowboy shirt layered under a suede jacket with half the inside liner missing… For decades, I dressed like a member of the Southern Harmony-era Black Crowes who had stumbled across Waylon Jennings’ closet….

My mom always wondered how I could walk into a Goodwill store in say, Seattle and decide that a used flannel with a hole in the elbow and a cigarette burn on the collar met my criteria as a “miracle find.”

“I’ll throw it in the wash and it’ll be perfect,” I would say.

“You’re absolutely disgusting,” my mom would answer.

Eagles_cactus HDC0066
Eagles 1972. How I’ve dressed since 1994.

For years, my mom would send me clothes from designer stores, trying her hardest to get me to wear a nice shirt, a tie or even (gasp) a sports jacket… I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I loved wearing stranger’s clothing… I relished the compliments the fashion forward men of my generation paid me when they admired a rare orange-tag denim shirt that came straight off the set of Urban Cowboy… I was a thrift store loving vintage picker… and my closet was full of the finest 70’s and 80’s shirts, caps, henleys, jackets and jeans any man could ever want.

My thrift store beliefs have even trickled down into my children’s lives – as I have tried to convince them that the Star Wars lunchbox I found in the thrift store toy aisle is just as good as the one they sell for $21.99 at Target… In retrospect, that was probably not the best decision.

in+thrift+aisle
“Hey kids, find a lunchbox and lets go!”

Recently, however, I have been examining people around me a little bit closer than I have before. And you know I have come to realize?

In general, people are pretty disgusting.

Filthy.

Unshowered.

Unkempt.

Smoking cigarettes.

Looking like they slept on a couch the night before.

Wiping snot onto the legs of their jeans.

Pony-tailing their greasy hair.

Rubbing their heads into their baseball caps.

Wearing exercise clothes for hours after the gym.

Itching their asses.

sweatttt
Chances are this guy once wore that cool shirt you want from Savers.

As I start my 40’s, I’ve suddenly started thinking that perhaps my mom was right… All of these thrift store clothes I own are suddenly looking pretty gross.

So, when I needed a jacket this winter, I decided to finally give up on shopping for dirty vintage. I headed down to an actual store that sells new items.

My first stop was the Levi’s Store where I immediately found the perfect flannel jacket with some sort of sheepskin lining. It had no weird stain on it… There were no cigarette burns or small rips or slightly discolored armpits… It fit like it was made for me. I walked around the store proudly. I got compliments from the cute sales girl. I stared at myself in the mirror… Damn. Did I look, dare I say, handsome?

After ten minutes, I even took a fucking selfie with it.

And then the cute sales girl told me it cost 375 dollars.

I got the fuck out of there and went to Goodwill…

IMG_3857
My typical outfit. Thrift store everything. Total cost: $12.00.

 

WATCH ZACH INTERVIEW BOB DYLAN!

 

Share this:

  • Click to share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

Blog at WordPress.com.

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Zach Selwyn
    • Join 103 other subscribers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Zach Selwyn
    • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...
 

    %d